A letter to Jennifer Aniston’s hair re: your new bob

Dear Jen’s hair (aka Bob),

We really like you. A lot. And we always have, since your Rachel days in the Nineties to your luxe LA lengths, but especially now you’ve gone short.

We love how you frame Jen’s face. We love how you fall at an extremely wearable just-below-chin length. We love your lighter, graduated blonde colour. And we’re about to let you into a secret – we think we love you more than Jen does.

So we’re about to offer you a great deal – why not come and sit a-top our heads? In return for this (frankly amazing) offer, we promise to brush you every day and wash you every other, we’ll wear you sleek but sometimes touseled to give you a day off, and, if you really want us to, we’ll whip you back and forth like that Willow Smith kid.

We mean, you must be bored of hanging out with someone so perfect all the time, right?

Please let us know how you feel about this and we’ll get the shower running.

All our fondest love,


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