We’re not buying Victoria Beckham’s Crocodile Skin Handbag for Selfridges. Are you?

Fashions multi-talented recruit welcomed motherhood into her plush LA mansion for the fourth time, after adding to her adorable brood a little girl, Harper Seven. Certain to be the best-dressed tot to crawl the Hollywood Walk of Fame (she will one day), her über stylish mother’s modish offerings just keep exceeding our sartorial expectations, and quite frankly, impoverishing us in the process !

Mrs. B has stunned the fashion pack with an exceptional £8995 crocodile skin handbag. Yes, £8995. The bag was unveiled at Selfridges on Friday and will be for sale as part of their Christmas collection;  rather fitting too in ladylike snow white with a gold hexagonal-link chain handle. In ownership of over 100 Hermès bags, Victoria is safely an authority in her own right on luxury handbags – and her newest creation is no exception.

But if you take a passing glance at the luxury handbag market, and consider the likes of Nancy Gonzalez and Bottega Veneta – specialists in their own right and also creating exotic skinned bags – selling their wares at smaller price points than the near £9000 mark, you’re forced to question the price validity of VB’s latest offering. Having incurred negativity from PETA for her use of exotic animal skins and then selling most of her ‘superbag’ collection for between £8000-£18000 may, to some, seem an audacious act by a designer ; but it’s not so much the ethical background of her designs that concern us, more their practicality.

I wouldn’t rush to say I view VB’s ‘superbags’ as iconic – no, we have the Hermès Kelly to fulfil that role. Having reportedly justified her foray into the world of accessories by complaining about other luxury designers benefiting from higher sales, thanks to her flaunting their wares; seeing VB jet-set around various airports with her £18,000 crocodile skin handiwork wouldn’t lure me into a handbag trance. And nor has her Selfridges creation.

The overpriced undersized bag gives me three reasons not to part with my (non-existential) cash:

1. Dire dimensions – box clutch size. If I’m paying half my salary to buy it, I should be able to fit my life in it.

2. The plight of white – a ‘trend’ colour and not the most practical of shades for everyday use.

3. An element of selfishness – although not an ambassador for animal cruelty, I’m not too keen on hanging the carcass of a departed lizard from my arm.

So whether you sell a limb, trade a beloved pet or decide to exist on a meagre diet of well, nothing in order to gather funds for this extortionate piece of arm candy, we’ll stick to the financially savvy option of admiring it from afar, until probably a moneyed handbag doyenne puts us out of our misery and buys it.

Happy lusting.

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