I believe the most fashionable people in the world are the Japanese, simply because they dare to be different and the most amazing people in life are those who don’t compromise themselves. So often we spend so much time pretending to be something we are not that I think we tend to forget who we actually are. I know I’ve done it often enough. Sometimes I don’t know what or how I’m supposed to be. All the time I hear people especially on t.v saying you have to be yourself but yet every day these same people are pointing out to us through advertising that you can’t be successful if you’re not this way or that way. By nature we want to be liked and if we feel that being ourselves may not be accepted then consciously/subconsciously we tend to take on the persona of what we perceive to be acceptable. I think 95% of people have tried to be something that they weren’t at some point. I know that in my case I have always been clumsy, a scatterbrain, not groomed at all, forgetful, insecure and most times incredibly emotional. I apologised yesterday for being such a scatterbrain and the person I was with said “that’s what I like about you.” It’s not often that people compliment me for what I consider my flaws. But I’ve gotten to the point where I appreciate mine and other people’s “imperfections” as that’s what differentiates us and if there’s anything that I can’t stand, it’s everyone being identical.
I am most loved up with a man when he is simply himself. No pretenses, no faking and thinking that he has to be all manly and strong. A friend confessed to me the other day that he was “tired of trying to be the man, top boy, all that nonsense.” I couldn’t believe he had been so honest, it felt very refreshing to hear the truth. Often we make life so difficult for ourselves. We have set up so many standards based on what “society” expects of us which most of us don’t want to or cant live up to and we wonder why over half of us get through life on some form of drugs.
The people I know and love, and the people I don’t know but admire range from those who know they are fabulous and aren’t afraid to show it because they genuinely love who they are and what they represent, to those who are not so confident about who they are but don’t pretend to be. I think we forget that life is so short, so what’s the point of trying to experience it with someone else’s characteristics, when you could be living and enjoying it with your own.
Text: Michele Obi