We all have that one friend who always cancels plans at the last minute. It can be disappointing and leave you feeling like they don’t value your time or friendship.
But don’t give up on the friendship just yet! There are some things you can do to handle the situation.
The first step is to try and understand why your friend is cancelling plans. Maybe they’re going through a rough patch or dealing with anxiety or depression.
Or maybe they simply don’t feel like doing the activities you’re suggesting?
If you approach the situation with empathy and understanding, you can find a solution that works for both of you.
Ahead, we’ll explore five ways to handle a friend who constantly cancels plans, so you can maintain a healthy and fulfilling friendship.
Communicate Your Concerns
When your friend constantly cancels plans, it can be frustrating and hurtful. However, before you jump to conclusions, communicate your concerns with them.
Start by expressing your feelings to your friend. Use “I” statements to avoid sounding accusatory. For example, say “I feel disappointed when you cancel plans last minute” instead of “You always cancel plans last minute.”
Be honest about how their behaviour is affecting you. However, avoid making exaggerated or false claims. Stick to the facts and your personal experience.
Once you’ve expressed your feelings, listen to your friend’s perspective. There may be underlying reasons why they’re cancelling plans. Maybe they’re dealing with personal issues or feeling overwhelmed.
Listen to what they have to say without interrupting or judging. Show empathy and understanding. This will help build trust and strengthen your friendship.
Dealing with a friend who frequently cancels plans can be tricky. You want to set boundaries without hurting their feelings.
So, start by being honest about your expectations while also acknowledging the value of your friendship.
Be understanding but clear that constant cancellations can be hurtful and frustrating.
Suggest ways to work together, like giving notice in advance or making a real effort to show up next time.
Of course, you’ll have to be firm in your approach as well. Try not to feel guilty about saying “no” or making alternative plans last minute.
Communicate your boundaries calmly but assertively, and let your friend know that respecting the other person’s time and effort is key to any good friendship.
If your friend keeps bailing on plans because they’re not interested or having a bad day, try suggesting different activities you can do together.
Maybe what you had planned wasn’t really their jam, or they just weren’t feeling up to it that day.
Switch things up and try something new, like taking a stroll or checking out a new restaurant.
If your friend keeps cancelling plans because they’re busy, try finding activities that can work around their schedule instead.
Find out when they’re free and plan around their availability, like a lunch date during their break or an activity that doesn’t interfere with their work schedule.
By being flexible and offering alternatives, you can keep your friendship going strong and make it easier for your friend to make plans.
Consider Their Reasons
It’s always good to put yourself in your friend’s shoes and understand where they’re coming from.
Chances are they may be dealing with some personal stuff that’s been tough to share or they’re going through a rough patch.
Try to be empathetic and not take their cancellations personally. If your friend is going through a tough time, reach out and offer your support.
Even a simple text message or hanging out in a low-pressure environment can mean the world to them!
Let them know that you care and are there for them.
Reevaluate the Friendship
Think about how your friend’s cancellations are affecting you. Are you missing out on opportunities to do things you enjoy?
Are you constantly rearranging your schedule to accommodate their unreliable behaviour?
Consider the impact on your mental health and well-being as well. If you find that their behaviour is causing you stress or anxiety, it may be time to reassess the friendship.
If you’ve assessed the impact on your life and find that your friend’s behavior is negatively affecting you, it may be time to consider ending the friendship. This can be a difficult decision, but it’s important to prioritize your own well-being.
Before making any decisions, have an honest conversation with your friend about their behaviour and how it’s impacting you.
If they are receptive to your concerns and willing to work on changing their behavior, you may be able to salvage the friendship. However, if they are defensive or dismissive of your concerns, it may be a sign that it’s time to move on.
Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your own well-being and make decisions that are best for you. It’s important to surround yourself with people who are reliable and supportive.